THE Hamptons’ newest land baron, comedian Jerry Seinfeld, and his pregnant wife, Jessica Sklar, are getting ready to renovate their cute little $30 million love nest on tony Further Lane. Although detailed plans for the East Hampton house remain under wraps, The Post has learned some of the proposals.
They include a complete restructuring of the interior second floor in preparation for the birth of the couple’s baby in the fall, a landscaping project that features trophy trees, and the creation of a lavish gym and luxurious spa with a shower that spouts French mineral water through a half-dozen heads.
Experts say that primary renovations on the first-rate Hamptons house will cost about one-quarter of the original price of the estate. That formula would put another $7 million in bills in Seinfeld’s mailbox.
That may even go up once every architect, decorator, contractor, wholesaler and supplier on Long Island sees the Seinfelds coming and adds their own “nut” – because they think Jerry can afford it.
“I’m sure there will be plenty of competition to get on that gravy train,” said Long Island building contractor Mike Adler.
“If he goes to the wrong people, he’ll pay more for screws than the Pentagon.”
SEINFELD’S magnificent 14-acre estate used to belong to singer Billy Joel and his then-wife Christie Brinkley. There are two houses on the plot: a main residence and a five-bedroom “cottage” Joel used to house guests.
Both buildings were designed by famed architect Robert A.M. Stern, who has built many modern houses in the Hamptons sporting a traditional or historic look with shingles and gables.
Chateau Seinfeld is just a short schlep – but, hey, still a schlep – from the ocean. Joel liked it that way because his previous house, which was right on the ocean at Lloyds Neck, was regularly spied on from boats filled with fans and paparazzi.
Nobody knows the Hamptons as does author Steven Gaines, who surveys the scene for the Internet’s classiest address, iHamptons.com. He told The Post that Seinfeld is planning some serious restructuring.
“The big drawback with this house, the main house, is that it only has three bedrooms,” he said.
“It’s a big house – so big that Billy Joel told me he never counted the rooms. But it does have just three bedrooms.
“And, of course, they are expecting a baby. So I’m told they’ve hired an architect to redesign the inside to create a room for the nanny and a nursery and playroom and so on.”
“Yada, yada, yada” becomes “Dada! Dada! Dada!” in late October or early November, so while there’s no need to rush, there’s also no time to just sit around.
“Somebody claims he hired Peter Cook, who is now married to Christie Brinkley, to be the architect on the house, but it turns out that’s not true,” said Gaines. “He’s hired some up-island firm.”
ALTHOUGH three bedrooms sounds a little cramped for a north-of-$30 million house, there are other compensations.
There is a huge kitchen with a center island, and just off an enormous living room is a music room where Joel used to compose at a beautiful, hand-crafted, grand piano.
There is also a cavernous circular library with a mezzanine that cuts through two stories, and there are spectacular views of the Atlantic from the second-floor windows.
Outside is a 70-foot, heated swimming pool, a romantic gazebo with a sunken Jacuzzi designed for al fresco trysts, and a pristine lawn rolling down to the dunes. Beyond three dunes is the beach and ocean.
“Every room has some nautical touch – anchors, paintings of ships, models of lighthouses,” said Gaines, who visited Joel at the house for iHamptons.com.
“Throughout the estate, antique commercial fishing boats are moored in the lawns, and there’s a ship’s helm embedded in the patio.”
But not for long.
“Jessica is going to take one look at that nautical stuff and whoof,” said a friend who knew Jessica during her ill-fated relationship and ill-starred three-week marriage to her first husband, Eric Nederlander.
“It’s not her taste at all. If it’s still there, she’ll have it all pulled out faster than you can say Dramamine.
“She’ll have adult trees brought in from Connecticut and replanted. She’ll want a hard court. She’ll want a solarium. She’s a Be&Me gal – the Best and Most Expensive always gets her vote.
FRIENDS of the Seinfelds can’t wait to see how the house turns out.
A well known standup comedian from the New York-L.A. club circuit, who knows the couple well, told The Post: “Everyone knows Jerry is a neat freak. He can hear you dropping crumbs on his carpet from the next room.
“He’s the kind of neatnik who can spot mouse droppings in the corner of the kitchen in the dark at 100 feet. So I don’t know how he’s going to adjust to life in the country.
“I read somewhere how Billy Joel and Christie Brinkley used to let hens or peacocks or ostriches run wild on the property just to eat the ticks from her horses. Can you imagine how many ticks there were? And I thought, ‘Ticks!’ Jerry is just going to love that. Ticks!
“I think he got out of town during the whole West Nile virus thing. Now he has ticks on his property.
“Every time his rear end itches, they’re going to think they have Lyme disease. They’ll be sleeping under a mosquito net the first night. You bet. They’re going to think they’re camping in Kenya.”
IN ONE episode of “Seinfeld,” Jerry became besotted with a girl, played by Janeane Garofalo, who had the same initials. Life imitated art in Jerry’s case.
“Jerry and Jessica are big into monograms because they have both always had the same initials. Jessica Sklar, Jerry Seinfeld, Jessica Seinfeld,” said his standup buddy. “So ‘JS’ is going to be everywhere.”
Both Jerry and Jessica are into working out. In fact, their love blossomed at the Upper West Side Reebok Club, where Seinfeld met her.
Plans for the Further Lane house are said to include a fully functional personal gymnasium and spa, with a wet room for steam baths, body scrubs and massages, and a shower that uses pure Evian water.
All the friends of the Seinfelds who spoke to The Post about the couple’s summer hideaway told us: “I can’t wait to get invited.”
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